I'm a nurse and the empathy/sympathy distinction is made much of in training. It's essentially as you state - maintain professional distance, while also communicating to the patient that it's OK to vent, to cry, to complain; conveying that you 'get it.'
And also to not get too personally emotionally involved. The only case I've personally seen of drug diversion was a pediatric nurse who couldn't handle kids dying and got wrapped up with the parents' suffering. Opiates helped to numb all that.
I remember when I was taught life-saving that you should not rush to the drowning person because they could grab you and pull you down with them. Instead, you stay out of reach until they calm down or tire out. Then you go to them, approaching from behind so that you are safe.
It must be really hard to maintain that detachment when it’s kids involved, though.
Hi Colin, I work alot in mental health and wellbeing and we teach people about empathy. Empathy really is about seeing things from the other person's perspective and trying to understand/sense/imagine how they "may feel" . We cannot ever feel what someone else feels so we should avoid saying " I know how you feel" because we are all different and we all experience life challenges differently. Instead we can say " I can only imagine how you may feel". Equally, people think that empathy also means sharing stories of similar experiences as a means of creating a connection (good intent). We generally advise not to do this because it removes the focus from the person seeking support to yourself and can make a person feel less supported. I hope this is helpful.
Thank you, yes. I do think the issue of who the focus is on is key.
You're right, now I think about it I would probably say something more like "I can only imagine what you're going through". Even if you've been in a similar situation, you can only have an understanding of how they feel, you can't actually know. I think perhaps my writing brain went for a bit more of an emphatic statement than I really meant!
I take the point about sharing stories, that's good to remember.
I'm a nurse and the empathy/sympathy distinction is made much of in training. It's essentially as you state - maintain professional distance, while also communicating to the patient that it's OK to vent, to cry, to complain; conveying that you 'get it.'
And also to not get too personally emotionally involved. The only case I've personally seen of drug diversion was a pediatric nurse who couldn't handle kids dying and got wrapped up with the parents' suffering. Opiates helped to numb all that.
Thanks for sharing that, it’s really interesting.
I remember when I was taught life-saving that you should not rush to the drowning person because they could grab you and pull you down with them. Instead, you stay out of reach until they calm down or tire out. Then you go to them, approaching from behind so that you are safe.
It must be really hard to maintain that detachment when it’s kids involved, though.
Hi Colin, I work alot in mental health and wellbeing and we teach people about empathy. Empathy really is about seeing things from the other person's perspective and trying to understand/sense/imagine how they "may feel" . We cannot ever feel what someone else feels so we should avoid saying " I know how you feel" because we are all different and we all experience life challenges differently. Instead we can say " I can only imagine how you may feel". Equally, people think that empathy also means sharing stories of similar experiences as a means of creating a connection (good intent). We generally advise not to do this because it removes the focus from the person seeking support to yourself and can make a person feel less supported. I hope this is helpful.
Thank you, yes. I do think the issue of who the focus is on is key.
You're right, now I think about it I would probably say something more like "I can only imagine what you're going through". Even if you've been in a similar situation, you can only have an understanding of how they feel, you can't actually know. I think perhaps my writing brain went for a bit more of an emphatic statement than I really meant!
I take the point about sharing stories, that's good to remember.